when will i see the effort?

aisha just got done helping me with my ics session this morning, we found out about acupuncture since i was recommended acupuncture by the only family member i actually trust not out to just help me at their own convenience/for their image. i need a primary care doctor to diagnose me and refer me for acupuncture in order for it to be covered by insurance. that's more work than amanda or any of my other family members (except joe) to help me with- so they just "support" me to go to courage kenny mindlessly even though i've BEEN THERE ALREADY AND THEY DIDN'T HELP ME WITH MY GOALS OF BEING AMBULATORY AND GETTING MY DRIVER'S LICENSE AGAIN. my grandma had to go out and find tram holloway to assist me with his ARP therapy- which actually got me on my feet again because even she seen COURAGE KENNY WAS NOT HELPING ME WITH SHIT. she was the only family member (except joe) that really cared about me and not how they look to other people caring about traditional methods of rehabilitation. seriously.. if any of you dicks ACTUALLY cared about me and ACTUALLY progressing with MY life to help me get to a place where I can actually be satisfied (because it IS MY LIFE! *gasp*)- you'd fuckin put the effort and care in to actually help me.. NOT BECAUSE IT MAKES YOU LOOK GOOD OR "CARING" TO YOUR SISTER-IN-LAW AND IN-LAWS.. TOTALLY IGNORING THE SHIT I'VE ALREADY DONE AND GOTTEN NOWHERE BECAUSE I HAVE A TBI- SO PEOPLE WILL JUST FIGURE I'M MENTALLY HANDICAPPED! i honestly NEVER want to talk to you again if that's your damn goal. IF YOU ACTUALLY CARED ABOUT ME- YOU'D BE DOING EVERYTHING YOU COULD TO PROVE ME WRONG BUT NOPE! *CRICKETS* you don't have time for me? I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR YOU EITHER. go assume you can take advantage of one of your other fuckin cousins since you obviously care more about them. I REFUSE TO BE ANYTHING LIKE MY MOM. whenever i come across decisions- i honestly do the OPPOSITE of what my mom would do and IT'S GOTTEN ME A HELL OF A LOT FURTHER IN LIFE RATHER THAN IF I'D DO WHAT THAT IDIOT DID OR WOULD DO. amanda should've just taken my grandma's lead and supported me to help me get outta this state and establish a LIFE OF MY OWN. NOW- THE LONGER I'M KEPT FROM BEING WHERE I ACTUALLY WANT TO BE.. THE MORE SHIT I'LL MAKE SURE MY FAMILY (EXCEPT JOE AND JAY) GOES THROUGH. courage kenny should get in trouble for GASLIGHTING me because their stupid asses erased ALL of my history with them. i'm sure it's because they have hopes in me wasting more of my fucking time doing shit i've already done because they're too useless of a facility to actually get people to think they're helpful and go to their pointless ass sorry excuse facilities.